Super-duper

I'm getting my blood pressure headache again.  BLAH.  It's only off and on; I had a nurse here at work check my BP and it was only 130/80-something so not too bad.  I'll have to get out my home one and keep track again.  I haven't even had caffeine since a few days ago, so it's not that.  Ehh, maybe it's the Chicken/Hamburger helper we've been eating every night..?  That's probably loaded with sodium.  And isn't exercise supposed to raise your blood pressure?  Seems kinda counter productive.

I think I have a tumor.  A fatness tumor.  It won't let me lose weight.  I've cut out sugared pop almost completely this past month and I weighed more at our weigh-in for the challenge than I did at the doctor's when I went in for my BP problem.  That doesn't make sense.  If I could give my fat the middle finger, I would.







Constantly.

And the trek continues...

My blood pressure is fine now (of course); not sure if I mentioned that yet.  I read more about Cushing's and I don't think that's what's wrong with me.  The other night while I was playing Star Wars, my hands (which were cold, as usual) started tingling.  Not like they fell asleep, but like someone was poking my fingers with thumbtacks every so often.  The next morning  I woke up to swollen hands with little red bumps on certain fingers.  I could hardly write because of the swelling and because the tips of my fingers were just sore.  They feel better today, but the lumps are still there.  I'm still kinda swollen, too.

I Googled it, of course.  About a billion things about Lupus came up.  Once again, my health-Googles have brought up Lupus.  Headahces?  Lupus.  Fevers?  Lupus.  Face rash?  Lupus.

Thank you, House.  Seriously, though, back in the day when I first got the rash on my face the doctor I saw wanted to test me for Lupus.  I foolishly said no...because I was squeamish and couldn't handle getting my blood taken.  Now I'm a pro at it.  Can I just go to the doctor and say, "Hey, test me for Lupus now?" seven years late?  That doctor I saw retired and they probably got rid of my records.

Anyway, enough about my hypochondriac...ism?  I need to find a part time job.  My student loan payment are going to be due soon.  Hopefully, they'll reduce them.  I'm not paying 150 some dollars a month; that's ridiculous.  I applied at Ulta a while ago but haven't heard anything.  It's probably because I can never pass those quizzes they give you during the application.

Feeling better

I had a nurse at work take my BP and compare it to the electronic one my mom gave me.  It was pretty close...and my BP was normal.  So, suck it, doctor.  I'm not doing a low-salt diet, but I have been trying to drink diet pop instead of my usual Mountain Dew.  ='(

I finally gave in and bought Star Wars so I could play with Chris and our usual gang over the weekend.  Not sure how long I'll play tonight; gotta take Damian to preschool Tues-Thurs at 9 in the morning.  O_o

Don't tell Chris, but I bought another pregnancy test.  It was negative, of course.  I don't know why I let myself believe it'll be anything different.  I just feel like I'm getting fatter no matter what I do. 

F*#@ me

It sucks to be fat and lazy.

Heard from the doctor.  He doesn't want to put me on meds; he wants me to exercise and lose weight first.  Hooray.  =|  I'm considering getting a second opinion.  I've gained 5-10 pounds since the last time I was at the doctor.  My BP was 117/72 then.  I can't imagine ten pounds raising it that much.  I actually commented to the girl the last time I was there that I wouldn't worry about being fat until it affects my BP....maybe I shot myself in the foot by saying that.

I did do more research on Cushings.  I have almost every symptom except the "buffalo hump".  I do have a hump, but it's not fatty, it's bony.  My vertebra prominens sticks out there; it's really noticeable.  Probably more so since I got a nautical star tattooed over it.  Anyway, it was scary reading the symptoms but I feel like such a dweeb going to the doctor all the time and saying, "Hey, I think I have this; test me for it," and then being wrong.

Uh oh

Well, at my free BP check today, my blood pressure was still high.  130/90.  The nurse was going to show it to the doctor and they are going to call me if they think something's wrong...or whatever.

But I left my phone at home.  Yay, I are smart.

10 Hour Day

Working 10 hours today.  I don't really mind...though I just ate a whole bin of cheesecake.  I really need to lose some weight.  Really.  I need to look like that pic of me on the top of this page; skinnier, even, because I think then I was still considered "over weight".  I tried zipping up my hoodie today- tight.  I'm down to one or two hoodies that don't cut my blood circulation off at the waist.  I should just kill myself now.

My face is looking more moon-ish as the days go by.  Maybe I have Cushings?  I'll Google that when I'm done here and read about it again.

My blood pressure check tomorrow is free, so I'm still going to go.  At least I won't have to pay them to tell me I'm retarded and nothing else is wrong with me.  Story of my life!

Until I was in my twenties, my family went to this one doctor not too far from our house.  It was a Catholic place (if that makes a difference) and the physician assistant was a nun.  Neither the doctor nor the PA ever believed me or my mom when we went there.  I told the dr. that Allegra gave me nosebleeds.  She laughed.  Not the most appropriate response.  When I saw the PA because I hadn't had my period for six months, she asked, "Could you be pregnant?"  I said, "No, I've never had sex."  She then proceeded to get a urine sample to do a pregnancy test...that I had to pay for out of pocket (and I could've gone to the grocery store and gotten one for 1/5 the amount they charged me).

I sincerely hope tomorrow when I go for my blood pressure check that it'll be high or out of whack and they'll do a blood pregnancy test and it'll be positive.  Then I won't feel like such a fat piece of crap.

As it so happens...

My blood pressure is back to normal.  Last night it was actually 120/80.  So, again, I will look like a retard when the doctor's office takes my BP on Thursday.  "We told you it was just your cold or stress," they will say, nasaly (or that's how I imagine it).  It's weird; every so often I can still feel pressure along the back of my head and ear where my headache was.  (If you find out I died in my sleep of an aneurysm, well, now you know the whole situation.)

Last night, as I was massaging my sore head, I noticed that the ball of my industrial piercing was missing.  I wonder how long it's been gone.  Thankfully it's the bottom one so the bar still stays in my ear.  Now I have to make a special trip to Hot Topic to buy a replacement.

Seems like another slow day at work.  I think I'll start working on my newest story.

New Health Trek

I've had a headache since Saturday.  (In case you were wondering, this is day 6.)  All weekend, I took my usual Excedrin, but upon realizing that it wasn't helping, I stopped.  Mostly to prove to Chris that the pills weren't the cause of my headache.  I also stopped drinking caffeine.  I had to call off on Tuesday because I was up all night, and later that day as I sat watching TV I had the longest palpitation possible.

So when I came in to work yesterday, I asked if one of the nurses could check my blood pressure.  I mean, I had ruled everything else out: caffeine, Excedrin, pregnancy (I took two tests).  Linda took my BP and it was 138/88.  My BP is usually low; like 112/70 low.  I made a doctor appointment right after that for today.  Of course, today before my appointment, Linda took my BP again and it was 124/98 or something along those lines.  By the time I got to the doctor's it was 132/98.  When the actual doctor took it, not only did he take it like four hundred times, but the number he said was something ridiculous like 138/100.

"That's a little high," he said.  Really?  Maybe that's why my ear feels like it's going to shoot off my head?  And everyone there looked at me crazily when I said the pain was in the back left of my head.

He ended up telling me that a headache from blood pressure wasn't normal (?).  After that, I'm not sure if he was advising me on my headache or BP problem.  He said to take Tylenol for the headache and I must just be under stress or it's from the cold I'm practically over by now.

Whatever.  I have to keep a blood pressure log and go back next Thurs.  If it's still high, then he'll try to figure out what's wrong with me.  How nice.